The Power of Forgiveness: Release Your Grudges

I forget the things quickly and don’t remember any incident for which to hold the grudges. I am Happy & Contented person and thank everyone who comes my way. When someone has to speak bad about me, I pray for him – May God forgive him and thank him for making me stronger.

Grudge means : A strong feeling of anger and dislike for a person who you feel has treated you badly, especially one that lasts for a long time. Holding a grudge is when you harbor anger, bitterness, resentment, or other negative feelings long after someone has done something to hurt you.

Grudges from Professional Life

During the work and deadline pressure, we used to fight for the results. Generally the functions in the corporates are organised in such a way that there are conflicting targets to different departments. For example, prodcution department wants to produce more and store maximum finished goods, whereas logistics department has target to control inventory of finished goods. As such these conflicting targets maintain the balance between inventory and finished good stock. However during day to day working, there is always fight for more prodcution and less inventory.

But carrying a grudge against anyone from other department does not fit into professionalism. The fights are for a situation and for the results and nothing personal about it. Hence it is inportant to Let Go these feelings and work in collaboration and harmony.

During my corporate life, I had developed one habit which helped me to remain calm and stress-free that is – When you come out of factory gate after the duty hours, hang on every feeling of the day at the gate and come out with empty mind. It helps to a gerat extent in avoiding stress and frustration. The gudge could be about your boss or your colleague, it is important to Let Go the grudge or ill feeling.

Studies have shown that the stress caused by grudges and resentments can lead to physical problems such as heart problems, high blood pressure, weakened immunity, and mental health issues such as increased anxiety and depression.

Grudges from Relationships

The common feelings in any relationship is holding a grudge. On many occasions, we feel hurt by the words spoken by our dear ones or loved ones. And we hold a grudge against that person. If you hold this feeling for a longer time, it will make you sick or depressed. The best way to follow is Let Go. First qulaity required for Let Go is empathy. If you are empathatic towards that person, you will be able to understand the root cause of his/her anger.

Focus on the issue rather than the Spoken Words

Often we hold on to the spoken words and forget the main issue. When someone is angry, the choice of words is always illogical or improper. If we focus on the spoken words, you never hit the resolve. Best way is to focus on the feelings of other person and ignore the words, you may quickly reach the solution.

Let us take an example – Your son returns home from his swimming class and he looks to be frustrated and annoyed. Does not respond to your questions properly and focusing on his spoken words you open a fight with him and start lecturing him about good behaviuor. He is further annoyed. Then the grandma enters the scene and offers him delicious hot plate of snacks. He jumps on his favorite snacks and finishes the dish fast. And you observe that suddenly his mood changes and he becomes normal. When you ask him about the spoken words, he says he does not remember anything. The root cause was the hunger.

How to stop holding Grudges

The best way to keep away from Resentment is Forgiveness. This is the great power everyone has . Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace. Forgiveness and Apology are the powerful tools in any relationship.

Space between Stimulus & Response

It always said that Respond to the external stimuli and don’t React. If you use the space between the stimuli and the response, you will not react emotionally and save yourself and the other person too.

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space.In that space lies our freedom and power to choose the response. In our response lies our growth and our happiness. Mindfulness practice gives calmness and clarity which increases the space for us.” Use the space between stimulus and response.

Conclusion

Develop Let Go attitude for peace of mind. Don’t hold on to the spoken words. Always use the space between Stimulus and your response. Life is too short to hold on the grudges, enjoy it fully.

Thank you for stopping by and resding my post completely.

Stay Happy anf keep smiling.